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Writing for my book "Poignant Silhouettes - The Book"
Coming soon

"Aaj main candle nahi jalaaoongi"

Aaj main candle nahi jalaaoongi,

Jal jal ke pighal gayi hain kayi candles,

Aur saath hi pighal gaye, bade shehron ke buland darwaaze,

Nahi pighle jo, hain kuch bigde dil yahaan,

Barson se liye, aankhon mein, nafrat ke angaarey,

Dhadhak ke hain laal, jo badle ke laave se,

Riste rehte hain, kishton mein,

Anayas hi de jaate hain, apni naraazi ke kuch zinda, kuch murda saboot,

Zinda murda ho jaate hain, aur murda khabar bankar,

Agle din bade kaale aksharon mein,

Meri subah aur kaali kar jaate hain.

Pichhli baar jab maine candle jalaayi thi,

Socha tha... ki jin dilon ko insaaniyat garm nahi karti,

Unhe woh shaayad kuch raahat de,

Mere saath tum bhi toh the, us bheed mein shaamil,

Jahaan ghairon ne bhi, wajah se rishte banaaye the,

Aadhe jhuke hue the wahaan, raeeson ke bhi parcham,

Aur gareebon ne jholi bhar ke aansu lutaye the,

Aaj phir sane hain khoon se, pade hain sadkon pe, school ke baste,

Chhide hain goliyon se, kuch nanhe paak zehen,

Gine nahin, par aadhe kaafir, aadhe mazhabi honge,

Par ab murda hain, toh koi mudda hi nahin.

Mat chhuo, pade rehne do, in pighle hue lawaaris armaanon ko,

Jaise ghar jaane ke baad, pade rehte hain peeche.. pighle mom ke kuch pulinde,

Jab chhant jayenge mitti mein, jo hain ghair mazhabi badan,

Aur reh jaayenge fakat mazhabi, 
Tab shayad pehchaan hogi, apne hi mustakbil ki,

Gussa shayad phir thanda ho!

Aaj tum candle mat jalaana,

Iski law se aur na uble, ruthe huye dilon ki fitrat,

Jal jal ke pighal gayi hain kayi candles,

Pighla sake bigde hue dilon ko koi,
Sard ho aahein, garm kare in mein jazbaat,
Main woh gunguni shama jalaaoongi,

Par main candle nahi jalaaoongi.

"The Feather under the Hat" #33

Feels like a long time. Being away from writing doesn't really help. The emotions do dwell, the words continue to take shape and remain bottled up waiting to be released and revealed to the outside. But again, they get mingled and exhumed in the scarcity of time, list of priorities in the world of appearances, relentless desires, the usual. So after this long time I thought of starting at the same place where I left it - the hidden lessons in my routine stricken mundane life, and others around me, the Feathers. That, contrary to the other material possessions, are safer when shared and dispersed, worthless and forgotten otherwise.

'I' am important to me. 'I' is pretty, good to everyone, jovial, kind, sensitive, principled and impartial. Yet, is misconstrued by the peers as self-seeker, quick tempered, moody, unfriendly, domineering and a non-conformist. The difference here is in the self and others' perception and more often than not, is not merely a misunderstanding. And while I do not have an outright solution to make them both concur on the preferable image of one's own, I only intend to insist that its recognition is as important, as one's priority of creating, maintaining loving and peaceful relationships with other people. If you agree with me, you may want to follow some of this in order to resolve a problem, on immediate recognition of the difference:

1. 'Acknowledge' the difference.
2. Take an impartial stand in every instance of 'encounter'. In a discussion, appreciate on genuinely good suggestions, but do not criticise, condemn or complain.
3. Improve communication, personal and public - The lack of it spirals and populates the difference.
4. Avoid sounding desperate. Remember that everyone craves (note, not needs but craves) 'love and peace'. Don't overdo the 'Hi', 'Sorry' and 'Thank you', just be your regular nicer self and define it as 'Neutral'.
5. Lastly, absolutely not let the history of conflict intrude. Look at everyday and everyone as 'New'. It's important to forget the bad days, remember the good ones, and make the next one beautifully memorable.

I'm not a Sage and I often falter on the above (more than you think!). I can't be a fake, smile when I am hurt or angry, or make everyone fall in absolute awe of me. And quite frankly, I would just like to be surrounded by loving friends and family. But with my other relationships, I would like to maintain the peace, civility and order, not only to avoid confrontations, cold wars and so that they don't prick me in my sleep, but also since you know, 'I' is a good human being (wink!) ;).

 

Suno!

Suno. Ruko.Yahaan. Main hoon.. Main hi hoon!

Chupchaap aaine mein main tumhara ‘aks’ hoon,

Yun toh tum aur main rahe hamesha baraabar,

Par faasla ye hai ke be-awaaz reh gaya,

Gham aur khushi tumhari pe mera hai sab nirbhar,

Aitbaar toh kiya magar aitraaz reh gaya,

Ye aaj hi ki hai baat ke himmat hui hai kuch,

Pehli hi baar ki hai ye koshish maine sach much,

Kehna jo chaahta hoon, chhoti si baat hai,

Main kya bada kahoon, meri kya majaal hai,

Tum nahin par tum jaisa dikhta zaroor hoon,

Badle mein bewafa khushi ke par bikta nahi main hoon,

Shohrat nahi chaahta par zameer par guroor hai,

Saath rehkar bhi raha ajnabi, kya mera yeh kusoor hai?

Laute ho jab kabhi bhi tum zara aur bik kar,

Gire badan se hain kayi hisse mere bhi tootkar,

Kehlaya nahi par janam se rishta mera bhi tha,

Bhooli bisri kahaniyon mein ek lamha mera bhi tha,

Yun jab kabhi bhi tum palat te ho tasveerein purani,

Chhoti badi khidkiyon mein dikhti hogi ek shakl jaani pehchaani,

Woh shakl hai wahi magar badal gaya main hoon,

Tumhari galtiyon mein main ulajh gaya sa hoon,

Suno zara ruko, yeh main tumhara ‘aks’ hoon,

Aage nikal gaye ho tum, fisal gaya main hoon.

"Gratitude"



As far as you think, mine is good to go,

I’m not satisfied.

Yours is what you think that I said, Mine is what I think should have.

Mine is higher, where as Yours is your own.

Mine is priceless, as the grandest diamond,

Yours is a moment of judgment, a peek at the obvious,

The hidden is mine!

 

Mine doesn’t end anywhere, as it ends where I end,

Yours is conclusive.

The expression of me, is mine, the basic,

The collection of views, is yours, a serious inseparable concoction.

Yours is affection, friendship and love, Mine is competition.

Yours is diluted, Mine is nature.

Yours is kind, Mine is the teacher.

Yet, yours is important, as much as mine ever was right from the beginning,

As yours, is what I write it for, compare it against.

Yours is appreciation, Mine is gratitude.

 

Yet, in spite of Your’s benevolence, and the honest appreciation,

I’m not satisfied.

"For all the firsts, with you"

" Tu badan hai, main hoon chhaya,
tu na ho, toh main kahaan hoon,
mujhe pyaar karne wale,
tu jahaan hai, main wahaan hoon,

Hamein milna hi tha humdum,
Kisi raah bhi nikalte,

Yeh kahaan aa gaye hum, yunhi saath saath chalte.."

#SachinRameshTendulkar

Days like today make you feel that the clock never stops ticking. That growing old is inevitable. That nothing lasts forever. That everything has an end. That we're all going to die some day. Hopefully later than sooner :|

"Crimes of Hate in a developing country"

 

An annoying wake up alarm – (and if that’s not loud enough) – a deafening argument between the wife and the housemaid – followed by a never ending journey to work through the metropolitan traffic – only to encounter an ever frowning boss right at the entrance - of a negatively charged workplace - placed right next to a disoriented set of colleagues - working for a team that is always swamped with poor standard projects – back home to an ever discontented wife – and an unhappy self.

A typical itinerary for almost everyday

Unpleasantness Quotient

This state of unhappiness and un-fulfillment is measured by the ‘unpleasantness quotient’ that arises when, even after a healthy financial situation one continues to remain in a state of dissatisfaction, and ultimately develops a resenting attitude. In a developing and a growing country, personal income unquestionably rises too. But if this economic development ends up in a creation of a pessimistic society, does that make all the effort worthwhile?

Concept of modernization

According to Fred Riggs, it is the ‘developmental gap’ between the economically privileged and the under privileged that is the biggest challenge for administration in a developing country.  This gap is further unsettled, when a backward society struggles to deal with ‘modernization’ – a concept which means bringing about a ‘social change’ together with the ‘economic development’.

The cycle of economic development for a country may probably be about a 100 years long. But it is much shorter than the cycle of ‘social development’ – a factor of many interdependent variables in a culture. The simultaneity of both results in emergence of a ‘hybrid society’ that on the contrary, starts to overlook the importance of social change in the pursuit of economic development. It is a situation where modernization actually results in conception of a ‘Zombie’ culture - where people become focused on self-development rather than community development - where one man’s loss is another man’s gain – Where everyone hates everyone.

Egocentricity and Self centrism

An ego centric person is the one who disregards others’ perspectives and beliefs. In a country with myriad ethnicities and religions, small ethnic ego centric groups are treacherous to a harmonious coexistence. These are the economically thriving groups of individuals who on one hand claim all benefit of the collective growth in a country, but reject a widespread social change on the other hand, creating a barrier to a country level social development. They dwell on their gullible ethnic followers and misanthropically alienate a significant population from the evolution. Dealing with such groups can be extremely challenging for a federal republic that is extremely presidential at the local level.

At individual level, self centrism takes cues from ego centrism. The individual loses sight of a symbiotic living and becomes parasitic i.e. it feeds on collective growth but returns nothing. For example - A traffic policeman who accepts bribe for releasing a traffic violator, or a bureaucrat who passes a project in return of a huge favor, does not amount to a collective growth.

A very few could continue to pursue honesty and optimism in such a situation. The rest will simply develop resentment against the system.

Public loathing

Do you get almost sickened by the fact that there are too many people sharing too little resources?

We detest other people – especially where one world chooses not to contribute to the public money at all. The extent to which this feeling of ‘hatred’ persists in our minds, against this part of the world is beyond belief. To add to it, there is no way one can identify the tax criminals.

‘Hate’ is an emotion that runs through almost everyone, but is verbally expressed the most by anyone who has ever driven a car in a metropolitan city (read: road rage). It is in the form of the reluctance that we often demonstrate to the accident struck on roads (read: ‘Bystander apathy’). It is the ‘unhealthy mindset’ through which we perceive everyone else as a ‘potential rival’ to our very survival, whether at work (read: corporate rivalry), at home or in life as such which undermines every possible sensibility that one has an option to pursue.

In a country of limited means and massive economic disparities, the queue is a long one outside a public office, on a job portal, for admissions to a state hospital, school/college enrolments or for a service’s seat. Running out of patience is easy. Anger, frustration and hate is inevitable. 

Oppression of the weaker components of the society that followed the former caste system has evolved today, taking the crime against weaker sections of the society to entirely a different level, especially in case of women.

Crimes against women

Women are treated unequally invariably in every part of the country for all forms of nutritional, educational and developmental opportunities. According to National Crime Records Bureau, The dowry death statistics work out to ‘1 death every hour’. Unlike popular belief, rapes and gang-rapes are also social crimes and not sexual crimes that are committed as conditional strategies employed by men to ‘keep women in their place’. Especially, Gang-rapes where the pleasure inundated is twice and the responsibility of the crime diffused.

Even political leaders often overlook that the key to the economic growth lies in the development of a better world for women. Focus on this 50 percent of the world can unlock the full economic potential of a country, strengthen productivity, stimulate demand and boost growth.

Summary

To sum up, the biggest evil in a developing society is the inception of a ‘value system’ based on reckless virtues. It is important to stick to the values of humanity, love and equality, as the same will get transferred onto the forthcoming generations. The idea is to measure growth in terms of GDP, life expectancy, literacy and levels of employment and also in terms of the less-tangible factors such as mutual love and harmony, safety and freedom from fear of physical harm, gender equality and the extent of participation in civil society.

Such socio-economic community development is the key to a better country, a ‘hate-free’ society and a far less unpleasantness quotient for the day.

 

"India - the unfulfilled dream"

The most common conversation I have with other people these days is that how the Government conveniently passes the buck on crucial national issues. Everyone seems to have turned a skeptic of all government officials now due to what we have experienced in recent times. As the 2014 elections are nearing, there is heightened uncertainty on the very integrity of the two national coalition parties and none of the respective candidates seems promising enough to be able to turnaround the suspended ‘India growth story’, or to spearhead some serious disciplinary changes in the society.

As a child, I was always in awe of the great freedom fighters who loved their country more than their lives and sacrificed their youth for freedom, the nationalist leaders who were able to direct millions of people towards the single aim of overthrowing one of the greatest powers of history, and the distinguished statesmen that had brought the scattered princely states together to create the world’s largest federal system of all times – and that was not even a 100 years back! Today, corruption seems to be deep rooted in the society so much that it is impossible to imagine the nation that offers a socialistic solution to the problems, where the bureaucracy is not read as red tape or nepotism and the politicians work for the betterment of people without seeking wealth accumulating opportunities.

All of this has started to make me believe that we probably were better off being ruled over by the British Monarchy – or should have had set up a dictatorship rule for ourselves at the time of independence. Because the constitution then, written by the 207 members of the constituent assembly who went searching around and consolidating the “Good” democratic policies followed in the west, had its pedestal on the sentiments of the illiterate population craving for freedom since 200 odd years. We got a legally enforced set of Fundamental Rights, an obligatory set of Fundamental Duties, and a non-enforceable policy framing rule book for the state called the Directive Principles.

And hence in 1947, a free, but irresponsible nation was born, that eventually created a society that was abundantly free, but lacked self discipline. That trusted its statesmen to lead the nation with the same Gandhian principles. Unfortunately, that forgot that the future leaders can and will emerge only from among its own people.

In this light, can we still blame the government for all instances of corruption and carelessness? Or say that even 50% of these instances are only because of their misconduct? How skeptical should we be, and how much blame must rest on their shoulders for these mishaps?

The fact that the framing of laws in the beginning phase was more lenient than it should have been cannot be changed. But what can be changed is the resultant mind frame of the society.  The 60% literate population as compared to only 12% at the time of independence is only an advantage to the situation. We are not the same old illiterate bunch of monkeys, who could only recognize a symbol and would vote blindly without even knowing the name of the candidate. We do not want a prime minister who is made a prime minister just because his grand father was a great leader.

Changes of the society however will not happen overnight. They are slow, steady but far more efficient when resolved in the minds of the people – Like constituting a fearless whistle-blowing attitude, female education, self-aggression management, overcoming one’s sense of competition and comparison, empathy and understanding towards the economically deprived, mutual love, respect and chivalry, and awareness of the national events.

A deeply corrupt society can also be overthrown gradually by sowing superior quality seeds – for example by something as basic as a responsible and enlightened upbringing of children. Conventional wisdom long held that the children are not capable of lying and stealing, where as the more modern research states that the children start lying and stealing as early as at 2 years for many of the same reasons adults do - to avoid punishment, to gain an advantage, to protect against an unwanted consequence, and even to boost self-esteem. We all tell lies of convenience, and our children watch and learn — but not always so literally. Helping the future generation develop morality and responsibility for its own actions over the long haul is the goal and also a solution that we all can collectively contribute to.

The game is not yet over.

"Singing to the tune of... Don't wake me up!"

This is my life
Its not what it was before
All these feelings I've shared
And these are my dreams
That I'd never lived before
Somebody shake me
'Cause I
I must be sleeping

These are my words
That I've never said before
I think I'm doing okay
And this is the smile
That I've never shown before

Somebody shake me 'cause I
I must be sleeping


Now that we're here,
It's so far away
All the struggle we thought was in vain
All in the mistakes,
One life contained
They all finally start to go away
Now that we're here it's so far away
And I feel like I can face the day, and I can forgive
And I'm not ashamed to be the person that I am today


I'm so afraid of waking
Please don't shake me
Afraid of waking
Please don't shake me


- So far away lyrics by Staind